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A Trip Down Memory Lane with my First Book, Rushing to Distraction!

2/13/2024

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Author, The Blakk Dahlia, posing with her book, Rushing with Distraction
​The story that kicked off the Heartbreak Diaries Series: Rushing to Distraction (The Foolish Heart):

I'm sure this book had a different title but, I'll have to dig through old notes to remember what it was. With this book, I earned a new title, Published Author. The feeling of seeing my work become a published book was the most amazing one ever! I remember being very proud and motivated to get others on the market.

"Rushing to Distraction" was definitely a learning process. From not knowing how to even get the book to print, to now understanding the logistics of book publishing and gaining even more knowledge during new phases of this journey. 


Sneak Peek!
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​Standing in front of the bathroom mirror, wearing a damp towel, Farrah stares beyond her reflection. She sees beauty, passion, a giving heart, a loving spirit, and inner yearnings for love. Everything he doesn’t see in her. Her mind floods with questions. Did she try enough? Show enough? Give enough? Was SHE enough?
Preview book here!
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The process from concept to release was a hard one. I started writing this book in 2015 and it was released in 2018. During that time, I didn't think I was "ready enough" to publish the book. Then one day, it hit me to just put it out there and see what happens. Four books later, I have a complete book series all because I dared to try!
Learn more!

About the book: Rushing To Distraction (The Foolish Heart)

How do you know when to give up?
Farrah is driven, focused, and knows her worth until she runs into Jamie. After a long time of putting love on the back burner, the guard quickly crumbled over this man's potential. She wasn’t asking for romantic feelings, but when they showed up it was hard to let go.
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The Blakk Dahlia (E. Alexcina Brown) is a New York City author/blogger from Macon, GA. Recently, she released the book series, the Heartbreak Diaries outlining different perspectives of heartbreak. The Dahlia Diaries is a lifestyle blog penned by The Blakk Dahlia, sharing her story in NYC along with life lessons and tips she's learned in her journey.

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Don't Carry the "Wrong" One: Healing your past to embrace the future

9/1/2023

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Blog for the book, Wrong Vengeance (The Toxic Heart), from the Heartbreak Diaries Series
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Without context, "move on" can be bad advice to some. Moving on in the sense of only "jumping back out there" can result in the same heartbreak, if you're still carrying bags of pain. In addition to getting hurt, you can inflict toxic behavior onto a new partner. Before getting into another relationship, it's best to ensure that you're healed OR is in the process of healing.

"You don't have to like it, you don't have to hide your feelings about it. But accept it."


There still may be moments of sadness and anger. However, making sure your heart is taken care of can prevent you from breaking someone else's.

Fully moving on with the implication of healing first can entail:

Processing what happened. How many times have we asked ourselves "Did that just happen? No!" Understanding what happened gives a clear view of what to do next and how you can turn it around for the better.

Acceptance. This goes along with processing feelings. After you have an understanding of the end, accept it. You don't have to like it, you don't have to hide your feelings about it. But accept it. Not accepting that it's time to let it go can result in delusions creeping in. Delusions can have you running back, chasing after something that has ended, and creating the illusion that the pain isn't that bad.

Express your true feelings. It's okay to say how you REALLY feel. You can be sad, confused, mad, or even feel foolish for caring about the wrong person. Express that to release those emotions and get you into the process of healing. Don't lie to yourself. Speak them aloud.
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Mend your heart. Take care of yourself. Watch motivational videos, talk about it with your friends, etc. If needed there's nothing wrong with accessing your heartbreak with a professional. Find and use the tools/resources available to keep you moving forward healthily. Healing takes time. Don't be so quick to rush back into the dating pool to prove a point or to think that it'll erase how the past relationship made you feel.

Learning the lessons. Find out where you went wrong. What did you accept? What did you take for granted? What can you do different if faced with the same issue(s) in the future? If you got played...you got played. It happens. Look at the signs you missed and how you can spot them more clearly in the future. It's all about using the situation to propel you into a better life.

Finding ways for the heartbreak to make you better instead of bitter. Over time, the thought of certain causes of the pain won't cut as deep. With that, turn the perspective around. Instead of being angry, be grateful for the memories and the lessons. Being bitter only tears you down. It does NOTHING for the other party. Don't seek revenge (as much as it tempts you) as it only gives temporary relief. And can cause bigger issues down the road.
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Staying busy. Try a new restaurant, catch a movie, and plan a shopping day for yourself. Be sure to pour into be that love you by catching up with friends and family. You can also release the stress of the breakup with a workout. Find a new hobby. Anything that will keep your mind from staying in the place of heartbreak.

Resisting the urge to look back. It's oh-so-tempting to hop online and search for your ex. Why? What gratification are we getting by looking at their lives? There's nothing you can do about them moving on so you watching it won't change the outcome. Falling down the rabbit hole of researching your ex, tortures you. What you discover may inflict more hurt and throw the healing process off course. Even if they reach out, remember the rough times and how hard you fought and still fighting to get over it.
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And THEN, when you're ready, get back out there!
Wrong Vengeance book promo with sad black man and hands on his shoulder
In the book, Wrong Vengeance, Brandy took her past pain into a new relationship. Charles gave her everything she deserved and more. He came with a few flaws but none that she couldn't handle with a little patience and time. Throughout their relationship, Brandy morphed into her past, showing Charles a toxic side that he didn't sign up for. Will their love survive her pain?

About Wrong Vengeance
He Wanted to Love Her, She Wanted REVENGE!
Brandy's life has two sides: 1. Career, confidence, beauty, and brains. 2. Behind closed doors, there's a toxic being slowly draining her spirit. One night of emotional and physical abuse from her broken boyfriend killed her spirit. Although she escaped the bad relationship, a seed of pain was planted deep. Brandy unknowingly transformed into what hurt her.

Can true love cure a toxic heart?
Moving on with her life, she meets Charles, who is the total opposite of the love she left. However, fearing that her old life would resurface, she sends him on a whirlwind of complications, arguments, and toxic behaviors learned from the past. Charles vows to love Brandy through it all with his actions but, her bad habits can push him away for good.

How can one heal from trauma while trying to love again?

Don't have the book yet? Order your copy today! Available on MULTIPLE eBook platforms. Paperback copies exclusively available on Amazon!

BONUS! Get a sneak peek of Chapter 1: The Loitering Bachelor, from Wrong Vengeance HERE!

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​​​The Blakk Dahlia (E. Alexcina Brown) is a New York City author/blogger from Macon, GA. Recently, she released the book series, the Heartbreak Diaries outlining different perspectives of heartbreak. The Dahlia Diaries is a lifestyle blog penned by The Blakk Dahlia, sharing her story in NYC along with life lessons and tips she's learned in her journey.

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Getting Lost in the World of Words

7/10/2022

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Turning the page of a good book. From an author’s perspective.
The experience of diving into a good book told from an author's perspective. Learn how a self-published author creates through the view of a book lover.
It starts with a concept or a memory. Then a blank page turns into a fictional existence of descriptive inner thoughts and conversations. Even silence on the page speaks through character gestures. The perfect recipe for a mental escape. Leaving the reader ready to turn the page!
Nothing around you matters. Just you and the words. This is what being embroiled in a good book does to us.
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The plot opens, then thickens. Transporting the reader into a wordy world of romance, suspense, or thriller exuding from the pages. Facial expressions expose shocking thoughts as the story moves from introducing characters to the climax of the story. At the peak, hypothetical endings develop. Sometimes the hypothesis is proven true and sometimes a surprise happens. Either way, the book can’t be put down. 
I love to feel each emotion of the characters. I look to step out of my world and into theirs.
That feeling is what I love about books. Words become their own universe. Each conflict becomes the readers' conflict. Reality is placed on the backburner while intrigued minds dive into scenes feeling the feels of actions and interactions with everything in between. Main characters are supported, and villains are despised. Some may even root for the villain as their complicated layers are revealed, relating to the average person.
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I learned this quickly being an avid reader. Upon getting into the book, I re-create the characters in my head, utilizing the physical appearances described on the page. Locations are mentally constructed, sometimes altered if my vision doesn’t completely match right away. It's like watching a sitcom through the mind. After the book is done, I use my mental pictures to reflect on the stories I experienced. They often take me back to the place and time where I discovered the good read.
It’s the business of supply and demand. People demand a break from their life and we supply this break through the art of storytelling.
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The essence of storytelling through words. 
As an author, I look to create that same world in my books. I want people to FEEL something and explore different ideas. As a story lover, it's important to create the same space that I love when opening the pages of a good read. Not all may get it, but even just one “I've been there...” or “OMG, I didn’t expect that...”, makes the countless hours of creating worth it!

What do you look for when opening the pages of a book? What do you want to feel? What do you want to explore? What are you looking to learn? (Comment Below!)

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The Blakk Dahlia (E. Alexcina Brown) is a New York City author/blogger from Macon, GA. Recently, she released the book series, the Heartbreak Diaries outlining different perspectives of heartbreak. The Dahlia Diaries is a lifestyle blog penned by The Blakk Dahlia, sharing her story in NYC along with life lessons and tips she's learned in her journey.

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Bad Encounters: A Quick Run to the Store...

4/18/2019

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Dahlia Talk: Wrong Vengeance,
​from the Heartbreak Diaries Book Series
book discussion, wrong vengeance book by the blakk dahlia
Chapter 1: The Loitering Bachelor.
In chapter one of "Wrong Vengeance", the main character, Brandy encounters the unwanted advances of a no-good man who represents everything she's trying to run from. A quick run to the convenience store, late at night, turned into a fight for demanding respect as well as driving the point of rejection home for the "Loitering Bachelor". 
men in hoodies
What is a "Loitering Bachelor"?
A single, or not so single, guy who stands outside of a store. He's lurking b/c he has nothing else better to do but get phone numbers from women who are out of his league.

Usually he's unkept, jobless, and has no ambition for success. Everyday he wakes up and leave the house just to LOITER. Waiting for a woman to be captivated by his lies, only to use her for every good thing she has. 

Personal Experience
It always happens on the days I need to run in and out of the store. I don't mind saying "hello" or even giving small talk. But there's a type of man who doesn't understand the "I'm not interested" language. Sometimes I tell a white lie and say I'm taken. Then there's a follow up "Well can you have friends?". I get the persistence, however, if the tables were turned, a woman would appear to be crazy or unstable. Why can't these guys take the hint. Also, things can turn violent. Men whose egos are bruised tend to call you out of your name and get aggressive. So what is a woman to do in these situations. Give out the phone number anyway? I've done that, then ignore the texts/calls. Not all men get this treatment. The ones who are polite, charming, and even funny is able to get my attention. However, these "loitering bachelors" who KNOW they have no interest in anything beyond the bedroom or using a woman tend to be pushy.

What's your Loitering Bachelor Story?
Share your "Loitering Bachelor" story in the comments below!

wrong vengeance book by the blakk dahlia
About Wrong Vengeance
Brandy deals with the type of man she’s grown to despise. It’s hard for her not to turn into what destroyed her emotionally. She knew better. Knew she deserved better, but love…It ends in a nearly fatal disaster. Brandy was lucky to have fled the grasp of the pain attempting to draw her back in. Moving on, life deals her a good hand in love. However, the pain of what she escaped lingers; slowly releasing the monster within. Will she allow past hurt to eliminate future happiness? A constant replay of a bad experience can kill a good thing. It’s even worse when you’re becoming the Heartbreak. 

Don't have the book yet? Order your copy today! Available on MULTIPLE eBook platforms. Paperback copies exclusively available on Amazon!

BONUS! Get a sneak peek of Chapter 1: The Loitering Bachelor, from Wrong Vengeance HERE!
Don't forget to share your story below!
the blakk dahlia, romance author, black authors, author logo

​​​The Blakk Dahlia (E. Alexcina Brown) is a New York City author/blogger from Macon, GA. Recently, she released the book series, the Heartbreak Diaries outlining different perspectives of heartbreak. The Dahlia Diaries is a lifestyle blog penned by The Blakk Dahlia, sharing her story in NYC along with life lessons and tips she's learned in her journey.

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    Author and lifestyle blogger, The blakk dahlia (e. alexcina brown)
    "I LOVE to write and create. These are the diaries of how I work and deal in my world of writing and LIFE!" 
    - The Blakk Dahlia
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