Why Am I Holding On?
“…Lena Horne was a lady. And a lady always knows when to leave…”
My fav line from the movie “Madea’s Family Reunion”. In that case, Blair underwood wasn’t speaking to the great Lynn Whitfield’s character about a relationship. Somehow that line always sticks out to me in my own personal dating life…posing the question: Do we ever know when to leave? And once we know, why does it take long to act on it. Or better yet why does take pain to finally exit.
You can't put your finger on it, but you know something is wrong. Then, a sign appears; staring you dead in the face and still wanting to wait it out. At times, it’s okay to wait and see because things aren't always what they appear to be. Giving the benefit of the doubt never hurts.
But what about that gut feeling? The gut feeling unscrambles the truths that are half told. Connects the dots in the middle of the night, digging up the questions you should have asked. Laying the red flags on the table isn’t enough. You just can’t let that person go.
Many factors contribute to the lack of moving on when it’s time:
Deep down, we know better. We’ve been taught lessons both the soft (someone telling us OR watching someone go through it) and the hard way. But once you’re in it, there’s a force beyond what you know to be common sense. Beautiful words of what you want to hear deepen the connection; making it hard to untether yourself. Knowing that in the long run, there’s a slim chance that what you want and deserve is NOT coming from this person.
It doesn’t take much to find an excuse to stay. The nameless/faceless attraction will win over the list analysis. Leaving is a no-go all the while, your mind is screaming for you to get out before you get hurt.
Why Is It Important to Know When to Leave?
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