Nothing to give, nothing to say, nothing to create. I’m drained! A friend gave me great advice when things aren’t working out as you want, leave it alone. Don’t bother it, don’t touch it, don’t allow it to fester in your mind and spirit. There’s nothing left to do but allow things to organically come back together. And when the time is right, it does. At times, I find it hard to constantly create ways to simply…create. I can’t concentrate, can’t think, and don’t have the normal drive to sit at the computer. And when I do, the ideas just won’t come. I feel sluggish and tired, only wanting to lay in bed. It’s not that I don’t want to be productive I just can’t get with it. This is what I call burnout. It's more than having “writer’s block”. It’s a mental block, preventing me the ability to function at my full capacity. Time moves on and nothing happens. It becomes comfortable for me to “not do it”. Then it mentally takes a toll as I feel like I’m being lazy. I love to write. I love to create. I want to work. But my mind and body just won’t allow it. When this moment arises, I have no choice but to step back and regain focus on my own time. It can come from lack of sleep due to work and/or piling more on my plate to “keep up”. So, I want to share what I’ve learned during my moments of burning out. Be honest with yourself about what you can/can’t handle. It’s okay! How do you know you’re burnt out? One minute you’re going full force, producing at a fast pace. Then the next…boom, it hits you. Sluggish feelings and frustration set in because you can't produce like you used to. The feelings are hard to control and come out of. You have no choice but to go with the motions of irregular patterns thrown into your regular work routine. Whenever this feeling arises what can you do? First, it's best to identify what it is. Feeling the burnout can come in many forms. It can range from falling behind on personal and professional deadlines to staying in bed longer than the alarm clock(s). It can also show up in the physical form. Headaches, physical pains, tiredness, and even sickness.  Getting hit with these symptoms can make you feel as if you’re inactive. Self-doubt kicks in, bringing you further down into a bad spiral. Instead of piling more work and forcing it, recognize what is happening to you. Understanding that you’re going through the motions of burning out, helps in dealing with it. When to leave things alone. As you deal with the mental and physical changes from being burnt out, you must know when to leave the work alone. Allowing it to just create space to recharge. Taking time away from your project, job, or whatever that’s draining you helps in refocusing your purpose while getting the necessary energy back. What if you’re not able to fully take time away? Peel a few layers off your tasks. Cutting back can be just as effective. Just as long as you’re not trying to operate at full speed while your energy is on empty. When your cell phone or laptop battery is low what do you do? Charge it. You don’t put more work on it or curse it because it's lacking productivity.  What to do in the meantime. While stepping away or cutting back, it's best to fill those spaces with activities to refuel. Remember, taking this time is meant to help YOU. Not to take on different a new stressor or do for someone else. This is all about getting your mind and spirit back to a place where you’re operating on 100%. Here are a few examples of what to do:  Get ready for the abundance. Jump back in! After you have taken that necessary time, your mind and body have a way of letting you know that it’s time to jump back in. You can also test the waters if you’re feeling antsy but don’t hesitate to pull back if you’re feeling overwhelmed again. It tends to happen when you least expect it. All of a sudden, you feel better. The headaches are gone, and you feel like a new person. Once the burnout flows away from your recharging, you’ll tend to receive random overflows of ideas and creativity.  You wake up one day on a full battery and you’re ready to go! Burning out is normal. It doesn’t equate to a lack of productivity. You can’t escape it if you’re constantly working hard towards your goals. We’ve all been there. Don’t worry because it's only temporary, as long as you take care of yourself. Sooner than you think, you’ll be able to get back on the saddle operating better than ever!  The Blakk Dahlia (E. Alexcina Brown) is a New York City author/blogger from Macon, GA. Recently, she released the book series, the Heartbreak Diaries outlining different perspectives of heartbreak. The Dahlia Diaries is a lifestyle blog penned by The Blakk Dahlia, sharing her story in NYC along with life lessons and tips she's learned in her journey.
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 Seasonal depression, too much on my plate, cold weather, work, and more work, nervous about what was to come. I felt all of that. I looked forward to completing the run for my play (Penny’s Kids) and hopping on a plane to St. Lucia! As time ran down, I felt the stress and anxiety of traveling alone while handling business before I left.  Then, once I stepped off the plane, my heart, mind, and body were in paradise! Ending the month on a great note by visiting a new place really set the tone for finishing the year strong! Upon returning home, I felt rested, happier, and accomplished at trying new things.  So, what did I do while there? Enjoyed the all-inclusive resort, Bel Jou. Beautiful place in Castries, St Lucia with an amazing staff and two pools, and a view to get lost in. Let’s not forget about the food and the nighttime! Breakfast, lunch, and dinner were buffet style and the hotel took great measures in keeping everyone safe and sanitized. Fresh tuna, good salads, jerk chicken, omelets, and amazing drinks! I even tried my luck at karaoke which everybody loved! You can do things like that in places where people don’t know you!  Took a boat ride to Sugar beach and tried snorkeling for the first time. The ride there gave an up-close and personal look at the gorgeous deep-blue waters surrounding mountain tops that reached the clouds. I’ve never seen a thing like that before.  Snorkeling time. I’m a fire sign (Sagittarius) and water without a boat isn’t my thing. But I’m happy to have crossed that off my bucket list. I stayed close to the shore and enjoyed the small “fishes” swimming in clusters. I spent a small time there but, it was enough to have an enjoyable experience. (Maybe I’ll try again one day, lol). The boat ride back consisted of rum punch fellowship, dancing, and good music. I had a nice time enjoying the diverse crowd of people from different places taking in the moments along with me.
Spent the day by the pool with endless margaritas and rum punch. Who doesn’t want to leave the cold air of New York and emerge into a place where you can walk around in a bikini all day? The resort provided two pools with bar areas in each section. Soaking up the sun and feeling cool waters was exhilarating. I took a break from hanging out on my room’s balcony and took a few pics. Laid in bed with no worries. On my last day, I wanted to sleep in. I watched the sunrise over my balcony and enjoyed movies.  On the way to the airport, our taxi driver took us on a small tour before leaving Castries. We stopped in a small pub for drinks, and I got to know a beautiful couple from Ireland who spent two weeks there for their honeymoon.
 The Blakk Dahlia (E. Alexcina Brown) is a New York City author/blogger from Macon, GA. Recently, she released the book series, the Heartbreak Diaries outlining different perspectives of heartbreak. The Dahlia Diaries is a lifestyle blog penned by The Blakk Dahlia, sharing her story in NYC along with life lessons and tips she's learned in her journey.  Staying grounded in the final stretch.Summer is rolling on out. Even the sun the starting to leave us a little early in the evening. ‘Twas a fun and eventful one…but not without chaos and nerve-racking twists and turns that may have thrown us off course. In times like these, performing grounding techniques to keep us in the here and now. If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present. ― Lao Tzu Try these grounding techniques to relieve fear and anxiety as we finish this year strong! Breathe. Take a few minutes to breathe. Deep inhale through the nose, exhale through the mouth. Pausing for a moment to breathe helps in slowing down the mind and body. Positive Affirmations. Positivity is key. So cliché’, however, your mindsets the tone for how you will handle your days. Filling it with affirmations reminds us of who we are and what we’re capable of. Flushing out the bad thoughts brings clarity to many situations, giving time and energy to resolving and/or coping with whatever is right in front of us.
Laugh. Laughter cures more than we know. A small chuckle or a big guffaw can relax the; muscles relieving the tension and stress that is festering in your body. Go look at that funny video that brings a big smile to your face or a meme on social that puts a humorous spin on the current event. If your current situation isn’t a laughing matter, replace it with a few seconds of an entertaining distraction. There’s nothing we can do about what’s out of our control. Worrying won’t solve it. Reliving won’t solve it. Staying still and focusing on what’s presently is around us allows time to enjoy the present without the clutter of What to do…What I should have done.  How Do You Stay Grounded? Share your techniques in the comments!  The Blakk Dahlia (E. Alexcina Brown) is a New York City author/blogger from Macon, GA. Recently, she released the book series, the Heartbreak Diaries outlining different perspectives of heartbreak. The Dahlia Diaries is a lifestyle blog penned by The Blakk Dahlia, sharing her story in NYC along with life lessons and tips she's learned in her journey.  Although things are different, the world is trying to get back to normal. But do we want it? Or can we create a “New Normal” taking in the lessons from the past year? I choose the latter. With a new season upon us, I refuse to go back to the old. I don’t even want to think about the old habits, yielding zero positive results. Sometimes we do things just because, that’s how it is. I’m charging myself to take in this new season with a new outlook and creating new habits.  More Meditation. Sit down and breathe out the anxiety. I’m excited about the Summer, but that doesn’t erase the anxious feelings carrying over from previous seasons. Meditating more throughout the day (or at least once a day) is sure to help keep me grounded in the Now. Anxiety builds the fear of what might or never will happen. It takes me away from the current moments where I can live in and enjoy. Sitting down back in 2020 gave me time to breathe and think of more positivity to drown out the negative. Slowing down from a busy life will allow you to gain so much clarity and it's much needed.  Better Experiences. We can travel now! Events are popping up left and right! How can I experience these amazing things in a better way? For starters, I could just go! Before, I’d sit and wait; thinking about something important coming up like a life event, bills, or me just not feeling it. But this time around, I’m taking it all in and making time to visit and experience events like never before. I hate looking at Instagram experiencing extreme FOMO because I didn’t make it happen.  Saying ‘No’ More Often. Whether work or leisure, being a yes person wears me out. I do it to take care of other’s feelings, all the while doing a major disservice to myself. Saying no and meaning it unapologetically takes care of my peace. Something as simple as not doing what I don’t want to do, or having the time to do at the moment. Those who understand, will…those who don’t can find someone else to do it OR wait for it! Self-Care times 1000. The self-care kickstarted way before the pandemic, but now it’s time to take it up a notch. With offices reopening and NYC MTA getting back in order, I’ll definitely need a lot more “me time”. This calls for putting on my calendar and signing off from EVERYTHING for some self-care. Before it was sporadic. I’d do it on a Sunday here and there, or wait for the idea to come. This HAS to become a habit for me to keep the anxiety levels low and remain sane. Just because everyone else is up in arms doesn’t mean that I have to join in.  The heat moving in for a few months doesn’t mean I have to have a Cruel Summer. This can be the best Summer yet, only if I keep my head together and allowing the good times to flow. What are your plans for the Summer?  The Blakk Dahlia (E. Alexcina Brown) is a New York City author/blogger from Macon, GA. Recently, she released the book series, the Heartbreak Diaries outlining different perspectives of heartbreak. The Dahlia Diaries is a lifestyle blog penned by The Blakk Dahlia, sharing her story in NYC along with life lessons and tips she's learned in her journey. Tools my writing life can’t live without  Writing is so important to me. It’s yet another creative outlet to express myself and share authentic thoughts; with a sprinkle of imagination. Although writing may appear easy, sitting down with a notepad or computer; it’s not as simple for true creators. For me, there are “must-haves” that allow me to work freely without distractions along with providing the inspiration to get thoughts down on paper (or on the screen). With this, I’d love to share my list of essentials for writing. These elements help me to create within my own world. It’s all about relaxing, forgetting about the day’s mishaps and strenuous tasks, to…just write.  Thesaurus. With everything I write, I seek elevation. Often, I find myself saying the same things the same way. There’s no growth in that. So, my “handy-dandy” thesaurus helps me to express emotions and actions which A. upgrades my personal vocabulary and B. levels up my work. It also helps in the editing process so that my words don’t sound redundant and long-winded. As writers we tend to make the mistake of taking the “scenic route” to articulate a plot, however, keeping it simple yet descriptive ensures that my readers stay on course. Music/Binge-worthy TV. A little background noise doesn’t hurt the process. Dead silence can sometimes be distracting for me. I need to get into a zone and music/TV does just that. My playlist places me in a mood to write out a scene. For example, if the part is based around romance; 90’s R&B sets the scene to put that tone on paper giving a true interaction between the characters. I have to be honest if it’s a good song I do tend to get lost in the music but a little break to enjoy a throwback jam doesn’t completely throw me off course.  If I’m not listening to the music playlists, I’m watching binge-worthy TV. It can’t be a new episode or a new movie because I’ll become invested. However, old episodes of Sex and the City gives me the perfect inspiration to create a narrative that readers will enjoy. Television is like moving books acted out in front of our eyes. I like to study body language during quick moments of silence. Those gestures are just as important as the dialogue. This is helpful to explain reactions, creating a dynamic between characters. Cocktail. Who doesn’t love a good beverage to take the edge off? I usually write late at night. During the day I’m so amped with running errands, working, planning, creating, etc., etc., etc. At night, I’m winding down to start the next phase of work, which is writing. And a nice libation settles me and the mood of the evening dedicated to writing.  Depending on the mood, evening, and whatever I have available, is a nice enhancement for good writing vibes. Although I can’t indulge too much because I need to stay on course. Moderation is key! Creative space. Luckily, I live alone. So, it’s convenient for me to find a space to sit and create. Even then, some places in my home can be a bit distracting. I turned my living room into my own creative haven. My writing desk sits by the window so that I can feed off the lights of the night. Simple yet motivated decorum surrounds me and I’m able to write with ease; developing chapters of the stories I want to tell.  A creative space is important to writers. A concentrative mind feeds off of peace and a unique utopia of one’s personal styling. However, I’ve even been able to find time to write in others places like on a flight. But that’s where my mood music kicks in and helps set the tone of what I want to put on paper. In a perfect world, all of these essentials at once would create the perfect environment to lay it all out on the chrome book. But at least two out of four works for me. What are your must-haves for writing or your creative work?  The Blakk Dahlia (E. Alexcina Brown) is a New York City author/blogger from Macon, GA. Recently, she released the book series, the Heartbreak Diaries outlining different perspectives of heartbreak. The Dahlia Diaries is a lifestyle blog penned by The Blakk Dahlia, sharing her story in NYC along with life lessons and tips she's learned in her journey. |
"I LOVE to write and create. These are the diaries of how I work and deal in my world of writing and adventures!"
- The Blakk Dahlia Latest book from the Heartbreak Diaries Book Series
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